Thursday, February 19, 2009

Oh-oh, uh... I'm sorry, I'm not ready. Oh, no. You go ahead--no, you.

I'm notoriously bad about making decisions, particularly on the spot and especially when I feel out of place. Some people imagine hell as a place with brimstone and fire. My hell includes choices of toppings, condiments, and a waitress named Daisy who wants to know if I prefer white or wheat. God help me.

John is unfortunately familiar with my habit of waffling over menus and panicking in smaller, more intimate environments. In a Chipotle, I can never remember what salsa I like best (mild with just a little bit of medium, Caitlin! how can you forget this?!) and consistently forget to order my Burrito Bowl "to go," even if I'm eating in, just so I can shake it up and evenly distribute that lettuce throughout the whole bowl. It tastes worlds better, I swear.

I let people ahead of me in line because I can't choose a muffin; I surrender to the barista when I can't make a coffee drink choice; I flounder and order specials because I can't choose between the French onion soup and a French dip.

So when I decided to grab Subway for lunch the other day, John coached me through it via gChat. Needless to say, I don't go to Subway very often. Perhaps a belated New Year's Resolution should be increased decisiveness.

John: dont panic in line

me: i'll try not to!
John: just take your time and think about what toppings you want
and if they give you too much or too little, don't be afraid to tell them
me: are tey going to ask me questions?!
John: you can do it
1:25 PM me: oh no!
John: don't panic!
calm down
and just say may i please have a sandwich
me: cause i really don't want black olives on my sandwich.
John: and then answer their questions one at a time
that's ok--you just tell them that
me: will they name the toppings for me?
1:26 PM or am i expected to be such a regular that i will know them?
John: no, you have to look at them
me: oh god
John: there's a clear plastic
it's called a sneeze guard
me: i know these
John: good!
now we're getting somewhere
me: the toppings will be visible beyond the sneeze guard
1:27 PM John: yes
me: okay.
John: you think you can do it?
me: i'm not sure what's going to be good on my sandwich
i'm afraid i'm going to screw it up
1:28 PM John: onions and lettuce for show
beyond that its up to you :)
me: ok
John: maybe ask them what they recommend
me: i'm watching a video on it
John: also, you have five different breads to choose from
five breads?
i hate this.
okay, i give up.
1:29 PM i'm not eating lunch.
thank you for trying to help me though

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