The World's Most Unwanted Song is the bestest and funniest ever

You may have seen or heard this by now, but listening to one of the latest episodes of TAL opened my ears to this amazing piece of music.

Based off a poll of over 500 individuals that asked them what their most and least favorite aspects of music are, the staticians passed off the results to musicians who wrote the Most Wanted Song and the Most Unwanted Song. I've linked below to the streaming audio of the Most Unwanted song, which you really must listen to. People apparently hate children's voices, opera, communism, cowboy ballads, holiday tunes and George Stephanopolous. (The last one is understandable.) I've also included the lyrics below (click to expand), which are pretty hilarious. Just as an excerpt, my favorite lines:


"Easter Time! Easter Time!
Love, forgiveness, and the bunnies!
Easter Time! Chocolate Time!
Do all your shopping at Wal-Mart!"


According to the staticians' findings, fewer than 200 people in the world's total population will enjoy this song. Are you among them?

Listen here.



Yo I'm ropin' up my saddle
For the long, long ride
Every time I see the desert
There's something inside says
Yo! Yo! This is the life
Give me open land and a
Big ol' knife to get some
Bear, deer--even a snake
I light me a fire
Do the shake and bake
I say Yo! Yo!
I'm a cowboy now
The sun is hot and dry
Gonna rope me a cow
I say Yo! Yo!
I'm loose and free
Whoa there Nelly
You're the horse for me!

Rope 'em up boys
The desert is a callin'
Yahoo, yahoo, yahoo
Saddle up fellas
The desert is a callin'
Yahoo, yahoo, yahoo

Christmas time! Christmas time!
Jesus, Mary, and the manger
Christmas time, Family time,
Do all your shopping, at Wal-Mart!

Easter Time! Easter Time!
Love, forgiveness, and the bunnies!
Easter Time! Chocolate Time!
Do all your shopping at Wal-Mart!

Out on the plains
Just me and my mind
Took me a break
To read some Wittgenstein
Born in Vienna in '89
He obsessed with theories
Of language and time
Like the "Tractatus"
Where Ludwig would claim
"The logic of our language
Is misunderstood"
Philosophy is based
On a false pretense
So philosophy itself
Is nonsense, nonse!
Philosophy itself is non-sense!

Bedeutung ist tun
Es ist ein Sprachspiel
Nonsense! Nonsense!
Wörter sind Inhalt
Yahoo! Yahoo!

Yom Kippur! Yom Kippur!
Self reflection and atonement
Yom Kippur, that's what for
Do all your shopping at Wal-Mart!

Oh say can you--
Feel the embers glowing
And the turkey in the oven!
America!
Hear the children singing
There's a turkey in the oven!
Rockets red glare!
Candles are so pretty
And a turkey in the oven!
Do all your shopping at Wal-Mart!
Buy spurs that jingle at Wal-Mart!

Ramadan! Ramadan!
Lots of praying with no breakfast!
Ramadan, so much fun!
Do all your shopping at Wal-Mart!

It's home, home
On the big ol' range
Yipee tai oh
Get along there stranger
Rope 'em, ride 'em
Shoot 'em up good
We're big and bad
In the cowboy 'hood
I say Yo! Yo!
Got a river to ford
With a life like this
I never be bored
I say Yo! Yo!
I'm wild and free
Whoa Miss Kitty
You're the gal for me!

Whoa Miss Kitty
I say whoa there
Whoa Miss Kitty
Yahoo! Yahoo!

Labor Day! Labor Day!
Schools are closed and
Pools are open!
Labor Day! All the way!
Do all your shopping at Wal-Mart!

Oh say can you--
Grandma's on the phone
Go and tell her that you love her!
America!
Daddy's on the phone
Go and tell him that you love him!
The Golden Land!
Sister's on the phone
Go and tell her that you love her!
Do all your shopping at Wal-Mart!

Veteran's Day! Veteran's Day!
Big parade with guns and soldiers
Veteran's Day! What's there to say?
Do all your shopping at Wal-Mart!

Halloween! Halloween!
Candy corn for lunch and dinner!
Halloween, what a scream!
Do all your shopping at Wal-Mart!

Look out there
It's an Injun band!
Coming this way
Gonna fight for my land
And build a home town
Grocery store
American cheese
Worth fighting for
Call it "dry gulch"
O.K. Corral
Holiday Spot
For you and your gal
To get some cool shit
And desert rays
Cowboy living' the American Way
It's a cowboy living
Go! Go!
It's cowboy living
Go! Go!
It's cowboy living
All the way!

Rope 'em up boys!
The desert is a callin'!
Yahoo! Yahoo! Yahoo!

Saddle up fellas!
The desert is a callin'!
Yahoo! Yahoo! Yahoo!

People! Coming together out of a
desire to obtain political power!
Vice Presidential Candidate! Twenty-
seven electoral votes! Central policy
issues! Two party system! Struggle!
Gain control of the government! Executive
branch! Military branch! Foreign affairs!
Influence policy! Promote ideology--
fascism! Promote individual interests--
George Stephanopoulous! Imelda
Marcos! Promote special interests--
Sugar! Beef! Bananas! Lumber! Pork bellies!
Pork barrels! Coca-Cola!
The information superhighway! Three
thousand years of oppression!

Who enslaved humans of color? Who
invaded the Carribbean? Who
murdered all the innocent children?!
You did! You! You! You!

It may be you
It could be me
It's not enough
To wait and see
And when we all
Lock arms and sing
Then bells of freedom
Ring ring ring ring